Steve Bannon outraged after stepping on one of Jared Kushner's Hot Wheels

WASHINGTON, D.C.—According to multiple anonymous sources, the White House was thrown into conflict yesterday after an outraged Steve Bannon stepped on another one of Jared Kushner's Hot Wheels toys.

"Goddammit Jared! I asked you to pick all these up," staffers heard Bannon bellow. "Oh great, now my foot is bleeding. Jared, you know how long it takes my pus-filled body to heal."

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Kushner, the President's son-in-law and head of the recently created White House Office of American Innovation, is a devotee of the classic American toy. The floor of his office is covered with a hyper detailed road map and the born-into-wealth Kushner can be heard engaging in play races well into the night.

An unnamed staffer described the sight. "Oh yeah, any time you walk past Jared's office all you can hear from inside is Jared making car noises with his mouth. It's pretty incredible that he can play with cars so much and also still be such an influential political figure."

"Just wait until he 'vroom vrooms' the Middle East peace process."

This has caused tension with Bannon, whose office is across from Kushner's and who enjoys pacing the halls of the White House reading aloud from Sun Tzu's The Art of War and loudly cursing his enemies whilst robed and barefoot. On multiple occasions, Bannon has slipped on a marooned toy car and tumbled to the ground, leaving the white nationalist splayed on the ground with an open robe, a sight observers have described as "unspeakable" and "a despairing view into the dark heart of humanity."

Unfortunately for Bannon, it does not seem that Kushner's Hot Wheels are going anywhere soon. Reportedly, President Trump finds he is able to understand intelligence reports better when Kushner acts them out using his large collection of toy cars and action figures.

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