Muslim stories of strong women inspires single mom
As millions of Muslims around the world celebrated Eid Al- Adha on Monday, marking the end of the Hajj — the pilgrimage to Mecca — there are images that have likely become familiar to most people.
One of those is of Muslims adorned in white, circumambulating the Kaaba, the black cube-shaped building is believed by Muslims to originally have been built by the prophet Abraham.
What is less well-known is the story of one woman upon whom much of the significance of Hajj is based. Her name was Hagar and her story is the struggle of a single mother.
This year, Eid al-Adha was different for me. It was the first time I experienced it as a single mother, with my own two young sons. As the days led up to the celebration, I began to reflect upon how critical the story of Hagar was to my journey through separation and in finding my own resilience.
According to Islamic tradition, Abraham was instructed by God to take his wife Hagar and their baby Ishmael to the desert and leave them there as a test of his faith. Abraham is one of the most beloved prophets to Muslims, known as the forefather out of which Judaism, Christianity and Islam were born.
Hagar, understanding that it was God's will, submitted to her fate and was left with her baby in a barren desert, unsure when or if her husband would return. As Ishmael began to cry from thirst, Hagar went in search of water. She ran seven times between two mountains, Safa and Marwa, in search of something to give her child.
I would have given up after the second run, but Hagar did not.
Ishmael, in his distress, continued to cry, kicking his heels in the sand so hard that from under his feet, a spring of fresh water was uncovered— the well of Zam-Zam.
And so ends the story. Now centuries later, during the Hajj, Muslims pay tribute to Hagar's tenacity and hope by running between Safa and Marwa seven times. The well of Zam-Zam has provided sustenance to the billions of Muslims who have visited Mecca on pilgrimage over the past 1,400 years.
While Muslims look to the Qur'an for guidance, we look to the example of the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) for how we should practically live out that guidance. And yet, in my struggle to find my footing as a single mother, with all the fear, anxiety and loneliness that came with it, this was one time where I could not find any instruction.
It was then I came to realize the long tradition of strong single mothers in our faith, from Hagar and Ishmael to Mary and Jesus, and even the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) and his own mother Aminah.
Strength of single mothers
In a religion that is so often perceived as patriarchal and oppressive to women, the reality is that Islam has honoured the strength of single mothers across the centuries.
From their examples, I drew my own inspiration to persevere, finding a certain honour in that, in some small way, I was following a path paved by these incredibly brave and yet all too human women.
They were no longer distant figures relegated to the realms of theological discussions or side notes. They were real women who faced real fears and still took care of business. They had no choice in their circumstances and yet that vulnerability necessitated that they rely completely and only on God.
Winnipeg is no barren desert but like Hagar, I sometimes feel as though I am running endlessly, unsure when the stress and uncertainty will ease.
One thing I do know: protection and provision does not have to come from a husband but from my Creator.
And the belief that at some point, we will all find our own well of Zam-Zam.
Nadia Kidwai works for CBC Manitoba's radio current affairs programs. She has been chair of the Manitoba Women's Advisory Council and is the co-founder of the Canadian Muslim Leadership Institute.