Commemorations for 12 Quebec children lost in drownings become space for healing
Families gathered this past weekend to honour loved ones and rescuer from 1954 accident
More than 70 years later, the journey to heal from one of Canada's worst boating tragedies is far from complete — in many ways, it's just beginning.
Every year, there's a commemorative ceremony to pay tribute to the 12 children who drowned in 1954 after a motorboat capsized in the Lake of Two Mountains in Île-Bizard, a neighbourhood in Montreal's West Island.
But according to Gail Millington Grant, whose sister Paula was among the children who died, those annual gatherings were often bookended by long stretches of silence among those who were most affected.
"I was in my late teens and I remember asking more and more questions and my father always said 'leave that alone, stop bothering your mother, that's something we don't want to talk about,'" recalls Millington Grant, who was only two years old at the time of the drownings and is now 73.
As recently as last year, her older brother, who was 10 years old in 1954, shared personal details he had never disclosed to her before about how he found out about the tragedy and how it made him feel.
In addition to the loss of loved ones, it's those missing pieces and the feeling that history is being swept under the rug as a result of deafening silence, that those left behind continue to struggle with.
'Never got to say goodbye'
On July 13, 1954, more than 60 children attending the Negro Community Centre in the city's Little Burgundy neighbourhood went out to Île-Bizard for a picnic.
A man offered to take the children on a motorboat ride. He took two groups of children on round trips without incident.
During the third ride, however, 17 children between the ages of six and 11 piled onto the boat designed for seven adults.
The boat's motor flooded and a wave swept over it, causing the younger children to panic and jump into the water. None of them had life jackets and most of them didn't know how to swim.
Some of the children were saved, but 12 of them didn't make it.
In the years that followed, talking about what happened, the feelings of grief or even happy recollections of those who died, was discouraged, Millington Grant said.
She credits her grandmother who, thanks to a meticulously curated scrapbook of newspaper clippings and family photos, not only helped her to get some answers about the tragedy but learn more about who her sister was.
For the 40th anniversary, The Montreal Gazette contacted Millington Grant for an interview. When she reached out to her parents for more information, they forbade her from speaking to the publication.
For decades, Millington Grant's brother, Rodney Millington Jr., didn't want to open up about losing their sister Paula.
When the drownings occurred, Millington Jr. was at a different camp — the Red Feather sleepaway camp.
His go-to reply to questions from his sister Gail: "I don't remember."
Around the time of the 50th anniversary, Millington Grant got some answers during a conversation with a family friend, Howard Blanchette.
"Howard said he cried most of the night," she said, referring to her brother's reaction to the news his sister had died. "He was very upset."
Blanchette also told her the family decided to leave her brother at the camp for two more weeks after their sister died.
"He never went to the funeral and he never got to say goodbye," said Millington Grant.
The same year she had that conversation with the family friend, her father passed. Shortly after, she went to her mother, pleading with her to share her feelings about what happened in 1954.
"We need to do something about this," Millington Grant recalls telling her mother.
"We need to talk about it. There's so many people who don't know about it even in our own family."
Her mother opened up, and her daughter noticed how it seemed to bring her some relief — a sort of therapy her father might have learned to appreciate.
Can't go back in time, but we can learn
Every year, a special ceremony is held to honour the memory of the victims — to speak their names: Denzil Alleyne, Margo and Marilyn Fonseca, Brenda Kelly, Carol and Alan Leek, Leon Nealey, Edwin and Diane Springer, Doreen and Estelle Walton as well as Paula Millington.
Family and friends attend an annual service at Union United Church, an institution in the heart of Little Burgundy neighbourhood where many of the families called home.
Last year, during the boating accident's 70th anniversary, a plaque was installed at the site of the tragedy.
This past Saturday, during the commemoration for the 71st year, the King Charles III Coronation Medal was awarded to David Tagieff — who was 12 years old when he paddled out to the capsized boat and saved two children from drowning.
The medal recognizes individuals who have made a significant contribution to a particular province, territory, region or community in Canada.
For his part, Tagieff still can't really explain how he had the presence of mind to act so decisively. Although he doesn't like to dwell in regret, he does wonder how the situation might have been different if he'd been able to use a speedboat to get to the children faster.
"You can't go back," he said. "Crying over it isn't going to solve it so you got to sort of say, well, it's a tragedy and hopefully we learn from this."
Millington Grant speaks up about what happened to make sure the names of the 12 children lost are recorded in history books and to promote water safety.
"The children need to know how to swim, but they also need to know the dangers of the water, that things can change in a split second and the respect of the water is the most important," she stressed.
Last year, the West Island Black Community Association (WIBCA) made a commitment to raise awareness about the 1954 accident. Additionally, the organization is facilitating access to vital therapy. Two counsellors, Seeta Ramdass and Rosetta Sowkey have offered their services for free.
"It's never too late to heal, " the organization's president, Joan Lee, noted.
WIBCA is also working with the borough of Pierrefonds-Roxboro to provide swimming lessons.
In the days leading up to last Saturday's ceremony, Millington Grant grew tearful when asked about what it would mean to be present for Tagieff's recognition.
With her voice cracking with emotion, she said: "Even if he had only saved one — and he saved two — it's by the grace of God that those families didn't have to go through what the rest of our families went through."
For more stories about the experiences of Black Canadians — from anti-Black racism to success stories within the Black community — check out Being Black in Canada, a CBC project Black Canadians can be proud of.
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