Son's suicide leads Antigonish mother to support mental health patients

An Antigonish, N.S., woman who lost her son to suicide has launched a program to help others struggling with mental-health problems. 

"My son is not a mental illness; he had a mental illness," said Jodi Myles, whose 17-year-old son Jordon died last February after struggling with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, acute depression and a mood disorder. 

Myles wants to ensure people with similar problems don't feel alone.

In the past year, she started a Facebook group to open up conversation about mental illness, organized a walk raising $3,000 and donated care bags to mental-health patients at St. Martha's Regional Hospital. 

"Once you've been through this, you choose which way you're going to live," she said.

'Live on the side of hope'

Myles is president of the Jordon Myles Foundation, which was founded in her son's name with the goal of reducing mental-health stigma.

"I have to live on the side of hope, the side of love," she said.

Myles started a Facebook group called Antigonish Mental Health Awareness on "a very sad day" while missing her son, who she would message on Facebook when he was alive and when face-to-face communication was difficult. 

At first there were just two members, herself and Jordon's older brother.

By the next day, the group had 200 members. Today, there are 1,900 people on the page, sharing their stories and offering support. 

'Open up and tell your story'

"It's really scary to open up to people, a population, on a computer," says Shelly van den Heuvel, a member of the Facebook group and a supervisor at Celtic Community Homes Association.

The organization provides housing and other supports for people with disabilities.

"Once you open up and tell your story and get feedback, you know you're not alone," she said.

In September, 200 people participated in a mental-health awareness walk in Jordon's memory at Keppoch Mountain. 

The event raised $3,000, a portion of which Myles used to create You Matter care bags, which contain personal hygiene supplies, blankets, crossword puzzles and snacks. 

Handwritten notes

In December, more than two dozen bags were donated to the mental-health department of St. Martha's Regional Hospital.

Handwritten notes tucked inside the handmade canvas bags read, in part: "I'm sure you are struggling, I'm sure you feel vulnerable and imperfect. I'm vulnerable and imperfect, too."

Myles said she's still receiving messages from people expressing their gratitude for the gifts for incoming patients.

"They were thrilled, they were absolutely thrilled," said Myles. "One person said they hadn't seen this sort of thing offered in 30 years of work."

Myles's death was one of five suicides in Antigonish County in 2016, according to numbers released by the province's medical examiner.

Earlier this month, Lionel Desmond, a military veteran, killed his wife, mother and daughter and himself in a murder-suicide in Upper Big Tracadie. Their deaths brought attention to accessibility of mental-health services in the region.

"My heart is broken about what has just happened. My heart is still broken about my own son," said Myles.

She said her family didn't have trouble accessing services, but added members of the Facebook group often express frustration about wait times. 

Difficult disease

"I think our system is overwhelmed. I see wait times of six to eight months to see a psychiatrist," said van den Heuvel.

As she begins her second year without her son, Myles is hoping to start a mental-health support group and says the topic needs to be discussed more openly.

"I know the magnitude of this problem," said Myles, who watched her own son as "he rebounded, and he plunged, he rebounded, and he plunged. He was a lovely person with a difficult disease.

"My doctors and my therapist both say that I should take a step back and rest, but if I don't do this, who will? That's my question."