Tracy Morgan in 1st TV interview since crash: 'Pain will always be there'

American comedian and actor Tracy Morgan says he remembers nothing about the limousine crash that left him in a coma, and a year later, he still has bad days as well as good days.

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Appearing on Monday's Today show, Morgan sat clutching a cane and became emotional as he recalled learning two weeks after the June 7, 2014, crash that fellow comedian James (Jimmy Mack) McNair, had died.

• Can't see the video? Watch it here

"The pain is always going to be there for Jimmy Mack. He was a close friend of mine, a comrade in comedy, and he was a loving man and he was a warm man," Morgan said, his voice breaking. 

"It just hurts me to see that he's gone."

He said he came across a video of McNair's funeral on YouTube and said, "I lost it for about a week."

The crash occurred on the New Jersey Turnpike while Morgan was returning from an engagement at a casino in Dover, Del. 

Monday's interview was Morgan's first public appearance since the accident. 

Last week, he settled a lawsuit with Walmart, owner of the truck that slammed into the back of the limo van carrying Morgan and others. Morgan suffered head trauma, a broken leg and broken ribs, and is still recovering.

'I've been down'

The 46-year-old comedian, best known for his eight seasons on Saturday Night Live as well as playing movie star Tracy Jordan in the comedy series 30 Rock, says the last year has been emotionally difficult.

"I've been down," Morgan admitted. "I have my family, I have my wife Megan — we're about to be married —and my daughter and my son. They keep my spirits up."

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Morgan also told Today's Matt Lauer that he typically brings his family with him when he travels to gigs, but he left his fiancée at home with his infant daughter on the night of the crash, because she was teething at the time.

"When I look at that accident, my daughter was 10 months old, she wouldn't have made it, and Megan wouldn't have made it," he said.

"That's really the thing that tears me up."

Asked if he hopes to get back to performing, he replied, with a tear streaking down his cheek, "I love comedy. I'll never stop loving her. And I can't wait to get back to her, but right now, my goal is just to heal and get better. Because I'm not 100 percent yet. I'm not. And when I'm there, you'll know it. I'll get back to making you laugh. I promise you."