Latest from Laura Salvas
POPS HAS CHOPS
Father hits dad joke jackpot with birth of son on Labour Day
Patrick Turpenstein always worried his serious nature would hold him back from being a fun dad. But when Turpenstein’s first son popped out, so did his very first dad joke.
YEP, ORGANIC TOO
Co-worker's voice 40% louder when saying 'this is all from my garden' in lunch room
A new study suggests Canadians’ voices naturally increase in volume by up to 20 decibels when casually mentioning that they grew the fruits or vegetables they are currently eating.
THIS IS NO JOKE
14 hospitalized in wedding riot after discovery it's a cash bar
Guests armed themselves with décor and descended on the wedding party in a blur of burlap and lace.
LIKE NOTHING ELSE
Swiss Chalet's new Warm Lemon Water chips deemed epic failure
Swiss Chalet faced online backlash this week after releasing a new line of branded Lay’s potato chips.
DREAMS COME TRUE
Loud know-it-all in nosebleed seats named new manager of Blue Jays
Doug Barnaby has been scream-coaching the Toronto Blue Jays from section 539 of the Rogers Centre for 12 straight years.
FRANÇAIS
Quebec tourist excited to use decades of French education addressed only in English
“I have fantasized about being directed to toilets in Canada’s other official language since Grade 4,” sighed Withington. “I’d already come to terms with all the time I wasted learning algebra. But French?”
FOOD
Health Canada closes poutine shop due to utterly shameful gravy and cheese to fries ratio
Health Canada shut down a Ottawa poutine restaurant Monday for “mental health” reasons after the shop topped fries with unacceptably small servings of cheese and gravy.
RAIN RAIN GO AWAY
Woman with giant umbrella blocks traffic in all directions, injures 4
Downtown traffic came to a standstill at the intersection of King and Church on Wednesday, as pedestrian Martha Pingle took to the sidewalk with her unwieldy umbrella.
BAKING
Canadians receive long-awaited apology from person who first added raisins to butter tarts
"I have spent my life haunted by guilt for the undue anguish my recipe has caused the bake sale community."
DATING
Tinder replaces every 10th man with pizza users can swipe right to order immediately
When Shelby Dawson joined Tinder, she dreamed she would be greeting a slew of hot Canadians at her door. She did not envision a slew of hot pizzas topped with bacon, ham and pineapple.